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Writing poetry every morning, like EVERY morning lately has done some good things for my psyche.
But not watching the news in the morning probably helps even more. I used to come down with my coffee and turn on the news – no more.
I wanted to be part of the solution, I am not going to be part of the problem, and in my work and heart I’m doing good for people.
I have one life. That’s enough for everyone else to take. I’ve given quite enough.
You can tell I’m nervous when I don’t shut up, when I turn into a chatterbox that will do or say anything to avoid having to do or say what has to be done or said. I am not brave. I am not fearless. I am not even casual, ever, it’s always all or nothing for me, this or that.
But when it comes to you I’m able to slow down. Really, I have no choice. Your skin against mine creates a still silence that comes from nowhere else, only you, you soft mouse.
No one will hear you unless … Read the rest
it wasn’t the argument that ended things for you,
the one you held on to and wrote about, the one
you felt was so demeaning and mean —
it was a simple question — and you wanted to give a
simple, honest answer
that’s it
that’s all
you didn’t know what would happen
you didn’t even know what you wanted
to happen, but you lit the fuse that
would eventually blast you
to smithereens
boom
poof
and all these years later we are both
asking what the hell were you thinking
to do things like that, to do everything
the … Read the rest
In this relationship I have to be flexible,
I need to always be ready to bend if necessary,
and to make myself small and quiet
whenever I am asked.
One of the prices I pay for this relationship
is silence, my silence, my starvation for
affection and validation, and any
conceivable hope for the future.
Those I must pay for
one way or another.
One day, or not.
In this relationship I have to be ready for
cliff diving, train jumping, backflips, I
need to be prepared for the quick exits,
I always need to be ready to run.
I … Read the rest
I thought we were okay.
I was running on autopilot,
that I can admit,
but I know I was here,
present, conscious,
I know I felt loved even if
I felt it a little bit less.
I told myself “Sometimes,
it can’t always be 50/50,
sometimes one person needs
to offer the other more when
their well is running dry.”
So I offered you more.
I offered to give up my peace
so that you could have yours
for a while, and apparently,
that wasn’t enough.
You caught me last night,
deer-in-headlights I sat and
listened to all the things… Read the rest
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